Geek Turned Black Belt | Work From Home Dad | Vance Crowe Podcast Episode 35

Vance Crowe [00:00:00] This is the Vance Crow podcast. Morgan Freed. Welcome to the podcast. Are We Live? I'm glad you're here, man. Welcome. Thank you.

Morgan Freed [00:00:09] Nice to, nice to be here.

Vance Crowe [00:00:10] So thank you for coming over in a snowy Missouri Day.

Morgan Freed [00:00:16] Read that. The truth. You

Vance Crowe [00:00:17] Were out sledding with your kids.

Morgan Freed [00:00:19] Yep. That's that's what I do, man. I'm a stay at home work from home dad. So I get a lot of time with a lot of, a lot of kid activity. Yesterday, my, me and my little son and then my middle son, we played a serious game of Poca, or what is it? Pokemon Monopoly. And those boys take it serious. Is

Vance Crowe [00:00:38] Are the rules of Pokemon Monopoly

Morgan Freed [00:00:39] The same? No, the same, the same rules except all the, the pieces are Pokemon like land and the, the little, it's the same as regular monopoly. But when you're eight and 10, dude, it's the coolest thing on the planet.

Vance Crowe [00:00:50] Do did play all the way to the the bloody bloody land. We do.

Morgan Freed [00:00:53] We did. My littlest usually wins, but he would not quit till he was down to the last dollar. He's mortgage and all his stuff. Literally had like $3 left. And Knox is like, I won. And he's like, my, my littlest Beckham goes, dude, I got three bucks.

Vance Crowe [00:01:06] Good for him. We

Morgan Freed [00:01:07] Can, we can keep going.

Vance Crowe [00:01:08] One

Morgan Freed [00:01:08] More around. I just need to hit free Park.

Vance Crowe [00:01:09] Just had 200. Yeah, that's right. I mean that's, that's, that's, that's one of the best things about having a kid that does that. Yeah. It's way better than the little monster that Yeah. As soon as they start,

Morgan Freed [00:01:19] Well, they gotta do math too. So, and then there's interest. You know, we get crazy.

Vance Crowe [00:01:23] So you are here because a couple of months ago

Morgan Freed [00:01:27] I

Vance Crowe [00:01:28] Had a podcast party, which is a bunch of the guests of the podcast that live in the St. Louis area came and just, we kinda intermixed. We had a great time, right? Coach was there,

Morgan Freed [00:01:36] Right?

Vance Crowe [00:01:37] And he calls me over and I go over to him and he goes, Vance, I got a, I got a guest recommendation for you,

Morgan Freed [00:01:45] Anything. He says, you better listen, man. And, and

Vance Crowe [00:01:47] Like, yeah, he did it in like a low deep voice. And he's a giant, right? He says, giant. And, and so I'm like, who's that? And he goes, you ought to have Morgan on,

Morgan Freed [00:01:55] Right?

Vance Crowe [00:01:56] And so I was like, alright dude, that's

Morgan Freed [00:01:57] A dude man.

Vance Crowe [00:01:58] What, what is he an expert in? And he goes, he's an expert in bullshit. But then he stopped me and

Morgan Freed [00:02:05] He

Vance Crowe [00:02:05] Said, Morgan has been through the most crazy things in his life. He's like, you wouldn't even believe it. He's a black belt in Juujitsu. Right? And he has climbed to the top of every organization that he ever gets around and involved with. It's true. And he was like, you're gonna have a good conversation with him. So you show up to my house and you're all little tanked up,

Morgan Freed [00:02:28] Bandaged up, little bandage

Vance Crowe [00:02:29] Up. What's going on, man? Well,

Morgan Freed [00:02:30] That just happened. That happened. You know, I'm not as young as I used to be. You know, I'd like to think I'm 23. Problem is I'm about 41. And when you train with some of these young cats, you know, they, they're out for blood, which is normal. So I try to keep up, and this happened from our good friend Orlando Sanders. Oh,

Vance Crowe [00:02:47] I,

Morgan Freed [00:02:48] Well shout out. He's in Vegas trying out Nice. He's trying out to make it into the big leagues. And he just shot for a takeout.

Vance Crowe [00:02:53] He was my first coach. He

Morgan Freed [00:02:54] Was, he

Vance Crowe [00:02:55] Was great. He was the first one that ever started training me.

Morgan Freed [00:02:56] Never seen a guy with a bigger smile and just a happier human being. Yeah. Except there was a guy who you never met who you would've loved. His name was Peter Pan, that was his nickname. Wonderful human. He passed, but Orlando was a close second. So just good people. But he shot for a take down. I sprawled. It hurts. You suck it up. You tape it up,

Vance Crowe [00:03:14] You keep going. How long has it been bandaged?

Morgan Freed [00:03:16] About two months. Two months. Two

Vance Crowe [00:03:18] Months. So

Morgan Freed [00:03:19] Still training. I'll be there tonight. You know, so do what you do.

Vance Crowe [00:03:23] Wow. So how did you get into Juujitsu?

Morgan Freed [00:03:26] Well, before we even get into that, I think that that will be part of my story. And that's more like the half. And so I'd, I'd like to kind of tell you, and I'd like to look at this podcast as I'm gonna tell you the story of my life. And I believe, honestly, everybody you meet does have a story. Everybody you come across will have an amazing story. They will have ups and downs and losses and victories and beautiful things, and sad things will happen throughout their life. So we all have a story and we're all kind of proud of our own story. I think the reason Coach probably mentioned you to have me on is I have a very unique story with, of course, a lot of tragedy and a lot of wins and all the things that make a story amazing. So I'll kind of start with,

Vance Crowe [00:04:14] Man, you just set a high bar for yourself. 'cause you were just like, I'm gonna, I'm gonna tell you a story. That is amazing.

Morgan Freed [00:04:20] Well, it's different, you know? Okay. Like I said, everybody's story is amazing. So anybody who listens to this podcast, I'd like to preempt my story with you are special. And your story is just as amazing as mine. It's different characters in a play, right? So we're all a movie that everybody wants to see. I just happened to be invited today to tell people mine and for a living. That's what I do, is I also collect stories. Now, mine's different than the way you do it, but when I get to that part of my story, you'll kind of understand. So I was born and raised in Belleville, Illinois all my life. And the first part of my story will start with my

Vance Crowe [00:04:58] Dude, you, you are definitely a juujitsu guy because I've never had anybody wrestle as hard as you are right now to, to grab control. And so, so when you start talking about you telling your story Yeah. Is this something you tell a lot? Have you go out and tell it many, many times? I have.

Morgan Freed [00:05:13] All right.

Vance Crowe [00:05:14] For for what? What purpose?

Morgan Freed [00:05:16] Well, my wife and I run a home business, a health and wellness business. And we help people with weight loss and energy. We do DNA testing. She's spoke in front of about 20, 30,000 people, about the debt we've paid off. I've spoke in front of hundreds of people, thousands, sometimes about what we've achieved. So the more you tell a story, the more you become proficient at the story. Oh

Vance Crowe [00:05:39] Yeah. Absolutely. So

Morgan Freed [00:05:40] I recon I can remember telling, and my story's gonna be a lot longer than it would be if I just told you my, here's what we do for business story. That's three to 10 minutes based on your timeframe. But what you learn to do is you learn to kind of bring things in, take out some of the unnecessary wording, and it becomes a very polished story.

Vance Crowe [00:05:58] Yeah.

Morgan Freed [00:06:00] So to answer your question, yes, I've got a lot of experience kind of talking to people, sharing my story. And I think what makes it special is I'm very open. You're gonna get honest. I wouldn't be surprised, honestly, if there comes a point in my story where I cry, that's normal. It's, it happens outta the blue sometimes. But that's because when you see me and you get to sit with me, you see this is a real person who's done some real things and it's only real because you can see that he cares about where he is now and what he's doing. So,

Vance Crowe [00:06:31] So where, where do you generally begin your story?

Morgan Freed [00:06:34] Where is this? So, well, like I said, normally based on a person, I don't give 'em all this other stuff that I'm gonna give you. This is a podcast. I'm gonna give you some crazy stuff that, that will tell you where I got. Normally it's a three minute kind of story. Hey, nice to meet you. What do you do for a living? Oh, this is what I do. I help people with this. Is that something you're interested in? So that's kind of the quick story. Yeah.

Vance Crowe [00:06:57] You

Morgan Freed [00:06:57] Know, you give 'em that part,

Vance Crowe [00:06:58] You grab an elevator pitch, grab an right and

Morgan Freed [00:07:00] It's exactly, it's exactly, it is an elevator pitch. Hey, this is what I do. Would you like to try it? No. Cool. We'll be friends anyways. That's fine. And then from there, your relationship grows and

Vance Crowe [00:07:10] They get to know you have, you've always been good at the, at the elevator pitch. Like even before you had your own story, your your hero

Morgan Freed [00:07:16] Journey. I've always, I've always been good at just really connecting with people right away, making best friends, kind of within the first five, 10 minutes. Me personally, the later on in the relationship, that's where I struggle. 'cause I'm kind of, I'm a go, go, go, go, go 10 minutes, dude. I'm your best friend now. I've made a new best friend. Oh, I've made a new best friend. So it's very,

Vance Crowe [00:07:37] And people have this sensation, if, if you, if the reason that they're really positive about you is because you showered them with attention. Yeah.

Morgan Freed [00:07:44] And

Vance Crowe [00:07:44] Then you take it away. Some

Morgan Freed [00:07:45] People don't.

Vance Crowe [00:07:46] Like is yes. I, I mean 'cause sometimes people never get

Morgan Freed [00:07:49] Yeah, they do for

Vance Crowe [00:07:50] Pay attention to them.

Morgan Freed [00:07:51] I, I've never had that backlash happen because I think people just kind of understand that Morgan's somewhat of a

Vance Crowe [00:07:56] Psychopath. Never know when you were, not, when you were dating any girls. There was never a, there was never a girl you dated that said, God, I I miss that attention that Morgan. Well,

Morgan Freed [00:08:04] If they did, they didn't tell me.

Vance Crowe [00:08:06] I mean, I don't,

Morgan Freed [00:08:07] I don't know how they feel about it now. I'm, I'm hoping they all like me. I'm still friends with a lot of my exes. So

Vance Crowe [00:08:11] I believe that.

Morgan Freed [00:08:12] Hopefully they're still like that dude. Dude's a good dude.

Vance Crowe [00:08:14] Yeah.

Morgan Freed [00:08:14] Maybe one or two of course more. But, so I'll start in high school. I'll start in high school just 'cause it's, that's where my story kinda starts. And this, you'll have a whole bunch of questions about where it goes. Just from this little part. In my sophomore year of high school, I went to an all white high school in Freeburg. Apparently you cannot smoke pot on campus. I did not know this. So me and a friend did. And we got caught. My father at the time, who was an inner city school teacher in East St. Louis Lincoln, taught there for 30 years entirely all black. Retired as a principal from Washington Park. Took me outta school before they could expel me. And I am the first kid to ever go or graduate from an entirely all black high school in East St. Louis. So imagine a street. Whoa.

Vance Crowe [00:09:00] You've got

Morgan Freed [00:09:01] Lincoln Senior High School on one side and lag gto literally on the other side. Now before you start asking me questions about that, and I'll answer all kinds of them. I've been going there my whole life. I was in their jazz band when I was a little kid. I actually played piano, violin, and saxophone. So I've been there, but I've never been there. Right. You know, my father would bring me as a young kid. So I knew

Vance Crowe [00:09:24] Yeah, you were there. But at the end of the day, I in end you went home. Yeah.

Morgan Freed [00:09:27] So I remember my, and I'll tell you my very first day. So I got kicked outta Freeburg

Vance Crowe [00:09:35] Father

Morgan Freed [00:09:35] Said, Hey, we're gonna Lincoln, I was terrified. I will not lie. You know, it's very, you see the movies Boys in the hood, right? This is where I'm going.

Vance Crowe [00:09:42] Were you a were you a big dude like you are now? No. No. I didn't get like for, so for people that are listening, you are a remarkably in shape person. Right. And on top of that, it's not just like, oh, you're a good runner. Right. You've got definition. You're a big guy. Right. And you're, you're a hardcore jujitsu.

Morgan Freed [00:09:58] No, I was just a normal average 15-year-old. 1616 at the time. Year old kid. Little skinny, nothing. Wasn't into fitness lift weights, did not lift weights. Holy didn't, didn't really play

Vance Crowe [00:10:08] Sports. And you were a kid that was getting kicked up the band for smoking. SI was,

Morgan Freed [00:10:11] I was in the band.

Vance Crowe [00:10:12] That's right.

Morgan Freed [00:10:12] I was in the jazz band. So the, like I was the band nerd,

Vance Crowe [00:10:15] The jazz band nerd that was willing

Morgan Freed [00:10:17] To

Vance Crowe [00:10:17] Smoke pot on campus. Right. Is about to go to the all black. A

Morgan Freed [00:10:20] Little bit of a rebel also. Like I was still friends with everybody. I partied my brain's off, but played in the band. Okay. So,

Vance Crowe [00:10:26] Alright. So you weren't, this wasn't innocent Morgan?

Morgan Freed [00:10:30] No, no,

Vance Crowe [00:10:30] Morgan was not

Morgan Freed [00:10:31] Innocent.

Vance Crowe [00:10:31] Okay. Morgan

Morgan Freed [00:10:32] Was probably pretty awful.

Vance Crowe [00:10:32] Your dad probably knew that you needed some change.

Morgan Freed [00:10:34] I started drinking at like 6 15, 16 heavily drinking. Okay.

Vance Crowe [00:10:38] Like I

Morgan Freed [00:10:38] Did all the drugs, man.

Vance Crowe [00:10:39] Okay.

Morgan Freed [00:10:40] So yeah, this was just finally got caught, you know? So dad says, we're done. You're going to Lincoln with me. I remember not wanting to go terrified. I thought for sure I would probably be murdered. So we might ride with my dad to school. It's very first day of school. This would be my beginning of junior year, maybe. What

Vance Crowe [00:11:01] Year would this have been?

Morgan Freed [00:11:02] I graduated high school in 97. So 95. Okay. Something like that. The school shut down in 98. So you, you'll have to understand what an inner city school is like. They're very run down. They don't have much money. Think toilet paper has to be chained, chained up, locked up to the toilet paper dispenser. 'cause kids will steal the toilet paper. They're that poor toilet seats. Everything had to be locked up. They will steal everything. Not because they're thieves. Because when you're that poor, a roll of toilet paper is, that's a lot of money when you have nothing. So I went there and of course a lot of the doors are locked up with chains, which is crazy because it's a school, God forbid there's a fire. But hey, you can't let people coming off the streets 'cause they would, we get outta the car and I'm, I'm, I mean, sweating bullets, man. This is for real. I'm doing this once again, only white kid. I, I not, not any other white kids. It wasn't a mixed school. There weren't a Mexican or whatever.

Vance Crowe [00:12:04] Did you know very many black people before

Morgan Freed [00:12:06] Together? A few for sure. I mean, I was never, Freeberg was predominantly white. And I was born and raised in Bellville. So I definitely had black friends, but I wasn't like part of the culture.

Vance Crowe [00:12:18] And so when you say like, you're worried about this, like how worried are you? You're, you're like, couple nights before you're,

Morgan Freed [00:12:25] I rolled up a thing of pennies and duct tape. 'cause I figured I was gonna have to, and I, I think I might have brought a pocket knife. I figured I was gonna fight to the death that day. I'm going to die. That's really what I thought. I don't think I told my father that ever. But I definitely had rolled up pennies and I'm like, if I'm going out, I'm going out fighting. So we get there and out walks this high school kid. He's about 6 7, 330 pounds. Huge UI mean hands the size of basketballs. Massive. Man comes up right to my dad. Oh. And I, I won't do his accent. Accent, right. He goes, you bought your son. 'cause my dad had told everybody I was coming This Morgan. Yeah, this is Morgan. What up man? And I'm like, Hey, how are you? He goes, your name's Pooky. I go, well, what's your name? He goes, people call me big ed. And I go, well it's nice to meet you Big ed. And Big Ed is was and turned into be such an amazing man. I loved him in high school. He would bring down these things called the golden turntables. And he could beatbox nicest man you'll ever meet. Scariest human besides, I mean high school sick. He's still a huge dude. I still talk to him every once in a while on Facebook. He lives in New York. But his name was Big Ed and

Vance Crowe [00:13:43] He was a teacher at the time.

Morgan Freed [00:13:44] High school student.

Vance Crowe [00:13:45] He was a student. He

Morgan Freed [00:13:46] Was a student three 30 minimally. Wow.

Vance Crowe [00:13:49] Dude.

Morgan Freed [00:13:49] Massive heart of gold.

Vance Crowe [00:13:51] Wow. Big

Morgan Freed [00:13:52] Teddy bear who may kill you. I mean, nobody messed with Big Ed. He was nice. He was goofy. Nobody messed with big ed.

Vance Crowe [00:13:57] And so then how was the rest of your experience?

Morgan Freed [00:14:00] So I'll tell you a couple things that people always ask me about the difference between a regular school and an inner city school. When I went to Freeburg the school and I, I don't wanna put anybody in a box 'cause I, I don't like to do that. A lot of the teachers were there because it was easy and they were there to get paid. And there's nothing wrong with that. Right? A school is easy, it's the kids show up. Most of them are respectful. They do their work. They come from at least somewhat better families. Usually dad's around, maybe he's not, but at least they're, they're respectful. So the teachers there or there a one they love teaching great b, they love, they love the children. That's awesome. But there are for sure some, some, some there who are just getting paid. Great. Nothing wrong with that. The difference between an all white school and an all black school. Where I went was I've never met teachers who cared more about their students and their students' wellbeing than I have at any other school in my life. Those teachers were there because they didn't have to be there. I mean, you gotta think a teacher gets paid what a teacher gets paid. Why would you pick that school? They were there because they cared so deeply about changing the lives of some of those students. Turning some of those students into a path of good and maybe not a path of bad. And literally amazing changing teachers. So that's the difference. So you felt a, you walk into the school and it's, it's almost, it's hard to say, imagine love being something.

Morgan Freed [00:15:39] You could see almost every one of those teachers at Lincoln had that. And that's the difference. Which is mind boggling. Crazy. But a hundred percent true. And I can tell you now, some of those teachers, it's still a little crazy. It's inner city school. My dad can tell you some stories. He's walked in on teachers having guns drawn on each other. I mean, it's inner city, you're gonna get what you get. But I remember almost every one of my teachers at Lincoln, I loved them. I can tell we had, I took a pottery class I made, it was an amazing experience. Now

Vance Crowe [00:16:14] Was that because your dad was the principal?

Morgan Freed [00:16:16] No, he was the teacher at the time. But I think it's because they're just kids. I think a lot of times we see what we see and we forget. It's usually not the kids causing the problems. 'cause even in East St. Louis, at the time when I went there, it wasn't the kids who were the issue. It's the ones who had either dropped out and still lived in the ghetto, or the parents who were pretty young still living in the ghetto. That was the issue. And that's a broader topic where you talk about why are they still there? Well, you know, there's no place to work, there's no buses. I mean that's a, that's a different topic for a different day.

Vance Crowe [00:16:47] Well I, it's interesting 'cause I have experience, but not in the same way that you do with inner city kids from Milwaukee. So I became the director of this like teen program summer camp for kids. And they would come out and you'd have them for 11 days and then you're caring for them the whole day and then overnight. So they're, they're there for 11 days. And it was a really interesting experience for me for a lot of reasons. And a lot of the ones that you're describing here, like I remember before they showed up being nervous that somehow these kids were gonna be like mean or like

Morgan Freed [00:17:23] Right. Wild.

Vance Crowe [00:17:24] You know? Yeah. And like that was a really good experience for this kid that grew up in central Illinois and then went to school great at Marquette. Like now all of a sudden I'm confronted my, my biases are confronted. And now you're like, okay, now I'm the counselor of some kids. That said, some of those kids had, what I figured out was the, the dial that is emotion, right? Yeah. Like, like happiness, excitement, frustration, jealousy, anger, whatever that is. Right. And all of the gradations in between those, like I was just able to articulate a whole bunch of different emotions that a person can have. One of the things that I noticed that with the kids that I was with is they didn't have a lot of language between I'm happy or I'm, I'm frustrated or I'm angry. Right. Right. And so a lot more conflict broke out in those situations than what I was used to.

Morgan Freed [00:18:19] Yeah. It has to do with showing, you know, you can't show weakness. You know, as much as I talk about love and how great of experience it was, it wasn't like it was, there was a lot of what you kind of mentioned, you know, it's still the ghetto. So at once school closes, a lot of those kids were on wild. I've had, I remember, I mean the truth is, at the school we had a guy get murdered for his shoes. They lit him on fire. I mean that's, that was the other side of the coin. You know, the coin I'm talking about is I was there during the day. I got to experience some amazing things. I did not go there at night and live in the ghetto with them. Because that's a different coin where you can be a great, I guarantee big ed, let's go back. Wonderful man at school, human being caring. I guarantee at night big ed couldn't be Mr. Nice guy and love everybody. Big, big Ed had to protect, which, what was his, and there was a different side to big Ed that I never got to see. Even though I've talked to Ed, I know he had another side. Like we've talked about some things that are crazy. But luckily I never had to see it because I wasn't in the evening time.

Vance Crowe [00:19:22] Right. And I think that's one of those things that it's really interesting that you have that insight as a kid that was in high school because it wasn't until I was in my thirties that I realized, wait a second, the kids that I go to high school with that I know really well in my mind 'cause we play football together or we, you know, see each other at parties, they go home to a different existence at night than I do. Yep.

Morgan Freed [00:19:42] You know, real

Vance Crowe [00:19:43] Different.

Morgan Freed [00:19:44] Even at Lincoln, back when I went, which was, you know, 20 years ago, most of the kids didn't have fathers. You never talked about their mothers. I was always a no a no go. So we had a thing, we called, we called it joning. Meaning I would make fun of you. You could make fun of me. I'm good at it. My dad was good at it. One of the kid, one of my friends would call me Ku Klux Klan drop out, I call 'em big musty. Like it was just, it was

Vance Crowe [00:20:03] What you do.

Morgan Freed [00:20:04] But the one thing you didn't do was talk about their moms or their grandmas because that's who their stable person was in their life. So there was, there were certain things that weren't just, you just didn't wanna push that button. Not saying they would do everything, but you know, don't push the red button. Right. So just don't push it, man. You'll be all right. So Lincoln, I can, you know, I had some great teachers. I took a girl to prom. Her name was Cornesha. Cornesha was super ghetto. But I, I remember she was awesome. And those of you who are seeing this, I'll have to demonstrate she had nails that went about this long extra. So she had the whole get up and that was my, my little high school experience.

Vance Crowe [00:20:45] So, and so you left high school and you were going on to college, you were going to trades.

Morgan Freed [00:20:50] What do you do? So I went after high school. I graduated in 97. I had a full scholarship for saxophone to BAC, which is now Swic, which is a community college.

Vance Crowe [00:20:59] Were you a nerd?

Morgan Freed [00:21:00] No. No. I was a, I mean, I was a party animal probably.

Vance Crowe [00:21:05] I mean, I didn't know many kids in the band that were

Morgan Freed [00:21:07] Like super cool. Yeah. I was probably the one cool kid in the band who drank all the time and smoked all the time and got high all the time. So I, I managed to be, I was friends with the jocks to the stoners, to the band geeks. It just, I've always got along with everybody. So I went to college for three years. I got two full scholarships and the third one I dropped out because I was drinking and smoking too much. And this is where part two of my story will come into play. So I did a year of nothing, but pretty much honestly drugs At 21, I got my first DUI, I think at that time I could probably drink two bottles of Jack Daniels. And you know, you name the, you name it, I did it and I had this epiphany. I was living with two people. One's in prison now, one, we don't talk anymore. What

Vance Crowe [00:21:57] Were you doing for work?

Morgan Freed [00:21:58] We didn't, I didn't work. We,

Vance Crowe [00:21:59] So how did you have money to do anything?

Morgan Freed [00:22:01] The one guy who's in prison would rob people and then me and the other guy would just stay in the, we would just get drunk. I didn't need much money. When you drink and you eat bread, you don't really, you don't need money.

Vance Crowe [00:22:12] It was that bad.

Morgan Freed [00:22:13] We liked to party. That's, it was poor decisions. Yeah. What

Vance Crowe [00:22:17] Were you, what did you feel like during the day?

Morgan Freed [00:22:21] I didn't really think about it. You know, it's probably something you can turn off. You don't, you don't look at it. I come from a pretty well, a great family. So the truth is, it was only a year. It's not like I kept doing it. It was like a year of just kind of finding myself. So yeah,

Vance Crowe [00:22:35] Like I

Morgan Freed [00:22:35] Said, dropped out of a college, moved in with this girl and these two guys and I just, that's what we did. We drank, she worked. I didn't work. The other two guys didn't work. I mean, the one guy was a tattoo artist. So we'd make a few bucks. We would just drink.

Vance Crowe [00:22:49] Wow. She would

Morgan Freed [00:22:50] Work. She paid the for the house or the, the rent. And we just drank. So it was one night. I just kinda, I don't, I don't think I talked to my father. I don't think I talked to anybody. I just had this moment where I kind of saw the path of my life leading down a place I didn't want to go. You know, I think a lot of us are given moments. I always say we're all given, and this would be just kinda my thoughts, but we're all given moments in life, certain moments that will change the history of what we are, what we become and where we go. Now I believe it's God speaking to us. But the problem is we don't always listen. Sometimes he says things and we ignore it or sometimes we just don't do it. But I believe all of us are given many moments in life that can change the outcome of where you go. Do you turn left? Do you turn right, do you do it? And I've had quite a few, few of those. My first big one was one day I just kinda looked at myself in the mirror. And I don't even mean a mirror, literally, I just mean, I just look, I just looked and I said to myself, if I keep doing this, the path of my life is not going to end where it needs to go. It will be prison or jail. Because this, there is no other outcome at this point. So I remember I told the two guys I was left, I said, I'm joined the military. I, they didn't like it. I do remember that they were upset. Misery likes company I guess. So I literally went into the Navy recruiter.

Vance Crowe [00:24:21] How hard did they push against it?

Morgan Freed [00:24:23] Pretty hard. I do remember they one time slipped acid into my chicken then because they didn't want me to, I mean, that's just what we did. They dosed you. It each

Vance Crowe [00:24:33] Me trying to make it so

Morgan Freed [00:24:34] You couldn't

Vance Crowe [00:24:34] Get in.

Morgan Freed [00:24:35] I smile about it. Like, it's funny. It's not funny. Hilarious. At the time we were awful to each other. Yeah.

Vance Crowe [00:24:40] Like awful to each other. I mean, I, I could see that. But then you look at the, I mean that's what it, that's the mind of a 20 something,

Morgan Freed [00:24:45] Right? Right.

Vance Crowe [00:24:45] Yeah. That's a minor.

Morgan Freed [00:24:46] So I went and saw the Navy recruiter. He was the chief. And I said, well actually I saw the Marines first. And I said, Hey, I need to get outta here. And the Marine goes well, blah, blah, you know, he said what he said? I said, well, I got a DUI. And he goes, well you can't leave for six months. We'll have to get a waiver. We're gonna have to, you know, make sure it's allowed. And I said, I don't have six months. I go, I need to go. And he goes, let's go see the Navy guy, the Navy guy who was the chief. He goes, you wanna join the Navy? I go, yeah, I got a DUI. He goes, and I don't mean it. 'cause he goes, who gives a shit? You wanna leave tomorrow? I go, no, I need 30 days. He said, come back in 30 days. 'cause I had to get clean. So went back, sobered up, didn't do any drugs, came back day 31, left the next day. That was my first step. And what I call really the point of changing my life for the better.

Vance Crowe [00:25:37] What, what triggered the moment of reflection.

Morgan Freed [00:25:39] You know, people have asked that. But I, I can't give a definite answer. I mean, I can tell you, God spoke to me. I can tell you I spoke to myself. I can tell you I looked at my life and who my parents were and the, the upbringing I had. But the truth is, I don't know. The only thing I can probably assume it was God's voice saying somehow I heard it that day and I took it and I ran with it.

Vance Crowe [00:26:04] When I look at the, one of the major pivot points in my life, it's funny because I've never thought of it this way until you brought this story up. But I was living in northern California and I got to have this like totally bohemian lifestyle Right. Because I had been in the Peace Corps,

Morgan Freed [00:26:22] Right.

Vance Crowe [00:26:22] And I got sick and had to come home early. So my buddy who I'd bought a house with and renovated and sold these good business guy, he and I hook up and he has just bought an old wooden yacht that had a fire on it. Oh wow. So we decide we're gonna take that thing from San Francisco up to this little town called Mendocino on the coast. It's literally paradise. Yeah. It's, it's on, on the cliffs. There's redwoods everywhere. And I end up working at this community public radio station right. As my buddy is working on the ship. And on nights and weekends I'd help him out. A couple my friends a

Morgan Freed [00:26:55] But wood. The wood craft, right?

Vance Crowe [00:26:56] Yeah. Yeah. Right. It was this old like, that's cool man ship. And so we're like steaming beams and sanding things

Morgan Freed [00:27:02] Runs on steam power. I got it. Coal.

Vance Crowe [00:27:04] It was, it was, it was so much fun. But then I ended up like diving, I had never been around weed before. Right.

Morgan Freed [00:27:11] And

Vance Crowe [00:27:12] Now I'm in California. Right. And it is well in advance. It's, it's right as legalization starts happening. Yeah. So they're allowed to grow it legally. So I find myself living this life where I'm like, okay, well I could just hang out and do this. You can, I've got a car that works, I've got an apartment, I, and I got a bag of weed. Yeah. I don't eat much. Like what do I need? Right. Right. And I started having these like dreams and, and, and conversations with my father who's alive. Right.

Morgan Freed [00:27:40] That

Vance Crowe [00:27:40] Was not having, but they're in your having this conversation with me. Right. And so I end up going and telling my good buddy court, the guy that had bought the ship. And he was like, oh, well, well why don't, why don't you call him and talk to your dad? Like clearly you need to do this. Because I was sitting there being like, I know I'm not supposed to be here, but I don't know what to do. Right. And the only thing I really care about is what will my dad think? Right. Of what I'm doing with my life.

Morgan Freed [00:28:03] Right.

Vance Crowe [00:28:03] And I think that parallels with God. Oh, for sure. Right. Like that, that the, the father. Right.

Morgan Freed [00:28:07] Well they say, right.

Vance Crowe [00:28:08] And so I have this conversation with my dad that in my head that there is nothing I could do that whatever please him. So why even try, why, why even begin if I can't possibly do that? So I tell my buddy court this and he goes, I think you should call your dad and tell him this. Yeah. And I said, I'd rather put a gun in my mouth than call my dad and tell him and tell him

Morgan Freed [00:28:28] That I'm not doing what I, what what, what you, what is my life's supposed to be. Right. And

Vance Crowe [00:28:33] So he hands me his cell phone. He is like, I think that means you really need to call him. And I did. And I found out that this conversation that I'd been having with my dad in my head about what he wanted me to be or what he thought I should be. Right. He wasn't having it. He wasn't thinking about that. Right. He's just like, oh, I just want you to be happy. Right. But that's one of those voices that, that is, I I ended up throwing the weed into the ocean. Yep. You know, very ceremonially

Morgan Freed [00:28:58] Defining moments. Exactly.

Vance Crowe [00:28:58] They're

Morgan Freed [00:28:59] Called defining moments, you

Vance Crowe [00:29:00] Know, came and took the GRE Yep. And went in, went to grad school. Yep. Moved to the East Coast. And so for you, yeah.

Morgan Freed [00:29:05] That's, that's a defining moment in your life. And like you said, you can call it God intervention or just good old fashioned willpower on your part. There was a moment where you said you took whatever it was and you changed the course of your life. 'cause think about going back in time. Go back to that moment and don't throw that bag of weed away. Right.

Vance Crowe [00:29:23] Oh yeah.

Morgan Freed [00:29:24] Don't call your father. Your life is not where it is now. That's

Vance Crowe [00:29:27] Exactly right.

Morgan Freed [00:29:28] It's just, those are defining moments man. And those are so powerful and so many people miss 'em.

Vance Crowe [00:29:33] But the only reason you get them is because something clicks that there's a greater purpose. That there's something that you should be doing. Yep.

Morgan Freed [00:29:40] That

Vance Crowe [00:29:41] You're not doing. And I mean, I think this has happened to me many, many times in life. Yeah. I think it's okay for it to happen over and over and over and over again.

Morgan Freed [00:29:48] I think, I think truth is, we're all destined for greatness. Everybody is destined for, you know, we are promised greatness, we are promised this. But every person, when

Vance Crowe [00:29:59] You say we're promised this, what do you mean?

Morgan Freed [00:30:01] Well, the Bible will say, by God we're promised, you know this wonderful life. And the truth is, you are, but you gotta work for it. You know, I like to say everyone's destiny can be whatever they want it to be, but it's gonna require turning some things off, changing some things. Maybe the friendships you keep have to change. There's so many cogs and factors that have to become and change in your life to get to where you're supposed to go. And everybody has a different path to get there. Some of us drive it, some of it takes, take it by train. Some of it, some of it's over bumpy mountain terrain. But kinda like what you're doing here is you saw a purpose. You said, you know what, this is something I want, this is something I'm going to do and no one will stop me and I'm gonna do it. And that's perseverance, that's believing in yourself and realizing that you can do anything you want to do with work.

Vance Crowe [00:31:02] So, so this the, your, your perseverance and kind of the inspiration thing you have, I believe, overcome something that is really difficult to do, which is you decided I want to get in shape. I don't know when you did it, but you haven't stopped. I haven't stopped. Which I think is, is the, is the really notable thing. 'cause I know a lot of people that would say, oh, when I was your age, like the other day we had a conversation on Twitter with some people, don't tell

Morgan Freed [00:31:27] Me the picture of your high school yearbook.

Vance Crowe [00:31:28] And I'm not impressed. And they were like, oh, when I was your age, I could bench this. And I'm glad to know it was an old guy that was kinda sharing it. But like, also like, what are you doing today? Right? And you're doing something today, but you've done it for a really long time. So has it, did you figure out what works and then just, just hit that thing the whole time?

Morgan Freed [00:31:45] So in 2002, I was stationed in, in DC and I got hit in the head with the cinder block.

Vance Crowe [00:31:54] What?

Morgan Freed [00:31:54] So I had my head smashed in. I was in a coma for a few days. I can show you, your viewers won't be able to see a picture, but I can show it to you if you like. Yeah,

Vance Crowe [00:32:03] Yeah. Pull it up. Okay. 'cause I can throw it under the video. Yeah. Throw it.

Morgan Freed [00:32:05] I'll send it. I'll let you see it here. So this is the start of another part of change. My wife always will say albums. Sorry I'm walking you guys,

Vance Crowe [00:32:15] You have to talk other, other, you have to talk about something other than the photos for people that aren't

Morgan Freed [00:32:19] Watching. Yeah. Well I'm, I, it's hard to do multiple things. My

Vance Crowe [00:32:23] Brain doesn't work like that. You, you had a cinder block. Why? Like where were you at that that could happen?

Morgan Freed [00:32:29] So here, I'll tell you the story. Find it. It's in favorites. Okay. So if you go through my phone in favorites. So in 2002 I was in the Navy. I was leaving a club and a group of men snuck up. That's it right there. Snuck up behind me and now I don't remember anything. So I'm telling you, based on what another guy there was with me, snuck up behind me, pulled my shoulder, and then hit me with a cinder block. So it wasn't so much a cinder block, but imagine a building that's been torn down and there's this huge chunks of rubble smashed me in the stomach. Oh

Vance Crowe [00:33:03] My God. Where were you that you would be around people that would do this?

Morgan Freed [00:33:06] I was in Maryland. So Washington, DC Maryland.

Vance Crowe [00:33:09] Where in Maryland? Maryland's

Morgan Freed [00:33:10] A big state. The club was called What

Vance Crowe [00:33:12] Was, okay, you were at a club. Big

Morgan Freed [00:33:14] Big club or something. I, it was $10. All you could drink one of those clubs.

Vance Crowe [00:33:17] Okay. So you were not necessarily Well, just as I joined the Navy

Morgan Freed [00:33:20] Didn't mean I quit drinking. Right.

Vance Crowe [00:33:22] Okay.

Morgan Freed [00:33:22] I I kept drinking. Okay. I just didn't do any other drugs. Hey, well I'll fill 'em. So,

Vance Crowe [00:33:28] So you were in a, in an, in an area that, that was not completely unprecedented, but it still looks like you weren't expecting, you know,

Morgan Freed [00:33:36] Any of your viewers or listener have been to DC or Maryland? Look, it's, it's not, it's got some wrong parts. It's got some scratchy.

Vance Crowe [00:33:40] I used to live there

Morgan Freed [00:33:40] Sketchy places. Right.

Vance Crowe [00:33:41] That's right.

Morgan Freed [00:33:42] So, so I was there and I and they

Vance Crowe [00:33:46] Were doing that to rob you?

Morgan Freed [00:33:47] I don't know. I don't know. I'm assuming Yes. Maybe couldn't tell you 'cause I can't remember. But, so I got in the head. I was in a coma for a few days. Woke up in the hospital.

Vance Crowe [00:34:00] The photo is your face covered in blood? That's, yeah. That's just, it's completely covered.

Morgan Freed [00:34:04] I used to carry a camera with me all the time. One of those disposables. 'cause I like to take pictures. Happened to have one on me that night. What do you know? They came in handy. So my, I don't know who that took, took the, I don't know who took the picture. Maybe my friend, maybe the nurse. But my, my Oh,

Vance Crowe [00:34:21] It was just in your role of film? In my role of film. You got it developed.

Morgan Freed [00:34:24] Yeah.

Vance Crowe [00:34:24] Whoa. That had to be so shocking. If you're like, next one, next one. Whoa. Right there I am in the emergency room.

Morgan Freed [00:34:32] So yeah. So because of that I had TBI, so I have traumatic brain injury. Some of the things I, I struggle with are memory. I have a really bad short-term memory loss. I don't sleep ringing in my ears. Night terrors. There's a lot of stuff that the TBI. So I'm actually a disabled vet because of that. 'cause there's a lot of issues that go on now.

Vance Crowe [00:35:00] Oh that's right. You were still in the military?

Morgan Freed [00:35:01] I was still in

Vance Crowe [00:35:02] Military. How long were you in the hospital for?

Morgan Freed [00:35:04] Three days. Something like that.

Vance Crowe [00:35:06] And, and they were doing reconstruction on your eye and

Morgan Freed [00:35:09] Oh yeah. Well that's right. My eyeball popped out. I actually pushed, I was told I pushed it back in. I don't remember. I'd like, my theory is I'm, I'm thankful I've always been a tough badass. Apparently I stuck my own own eyeball in my head. Wow.

Vance Crowe [00:35:21] Other

Morgan Freed [00:35:21] People would say, you're an idiot. You take it how you will. So that happened. The next thing I remember is being at work. So there's about two weeks that don't my life. Where are they? I

Vance Crowe [00:35:36] Remember where people had spoken with you. They think this is the exact guy that we know and remember and

Morgan Freed [00:35:41] Well, so after the injury, they always say there's a switch and that switch changes who you are as a human. So like I said, I don't remember two weeks in between the brick. I remember I remember leaving the club, the next memory I have is actually being at work with my face swollen and going, how did I get here? And why is my face swollen? And then it had to, somebody had to tell me what happened. And I remember

Vance Crowe [00:36:08] Were you horrified? I mean, 'cause you had to be looking around being like, what am I even doing? You know,

Morgan Freed [00:36:12] I wasn't horrified. Like for me it was, it's weird. I've never, I've never, I was never horrified. I was never like, what happened? I was like, okay, let's figure this out. That is the day that

Vance Crowe [00:36:25] Man, that's like matrix though. That's like, that's, that's like I stepped out of reality for two, two weeks. Two

Morgan Freed [00:36:32] Weeks, two weeks. Minimal.

Vance Crowe [00:36:33] And then, and then you pop back in and

Morgan Freed [00:36:35] Right in uniform

Vance Crowe [00:36:36] And the in uniform military on my, I remember I'm at my

Morgan Freed [00:36:39] Desk doing computer work and I'm just kinda like, oh, well how did I get here? And why am I here? I I don't, it's crazy.

Vance Crowe [00:36:46] I mean, I'd had a meltdown and probably,

Morgan Freed [00:36:47] Well I, I went to my chief and I, I remember I talked to my chief and I asked him what's going on? He kind of filled me in. He said, you need to go home. And I said, okay. So I went home and then I was, then from there it's, you know, you try to piece what happened, but I'm assuming nothing bad happened in those two weeks. 'cause I still had all my fingers and toes. But because of that and on this outside of that, you know, I have some issues with being in public. There's some stuff that goes on. I'm, I'm, my wife would say that's the day everything changed for me because of that incident is the day that I really 100%. That's when I got into fitness and martial arts.

Vance Crowe [00:37:24] Oh.

Morgan Freed [00:37:24] So people say what got you into martial arts? It wasn't, it was literally a fear of this ever happening again. So in 2002 after the brick, when my face healed, I immediately found a gym and started working out and training like a psychopath. And that's never stopped. And that probably has to do, and I'm in therapy. I see a doctor that has to do with everything goes back to this could happen again. And I know it. And I have to prepare to be ready at all times. Now there are some there that does cause some stuff in my life where I don't like to go out in public and I don't like to go to target with my daughter. And I don't like being in crowds and

Vance Crowe [00:38:06] You know, this is lot of weird stuff staggering for me because I only know you from the gym where you are. Carefree Morgan, very light, very happy. My gym is my safe place. Very. It's, this is astounding to me that you're saying you're uncomfortable in crowds. In in those crowds. Right.

Morgan Freed [00:38:22] So I have TBI and PTSD, but PTSD, you know, it has, the traumatic incident that happened has caused, you know what's funny is people say, what were you like before the brick? Brick? And I don't remember. So I know that I said I like, I like to do this and I like to do that. But I don't remember that Morgan, that Morgan probably a carefree guy.

Vance Crowe [00:38:44] Assuming you still like the same foods that you used to like, or you the,

Morgan Freed [00:38:47] It's not so much foods. It's, I think my demeanor changed. I've become so much more serious. I think before the brick I was probably whoever I was. And I think that brick is, it's imagine like night and day. I

Vance Crowe [00:38:59] Mean this is truly different person waking up, right? Yeah. Waking, waking up. This is like, it's, it's, so I ask a lot of people this. Are you into meditation at all?

Morgan Freed [00:39:09] I, I speak to God.

Vance Crowe [00:39:12] Okay.

Morgan Freed [00:39:12] But not, not, not like when I'm by myself, I pray, I pray with my son, I talk to myself. That would be my meditation where I'm like, alright, deep breath, you're gonna do this focus. You can go inside this store, it's gonna be okay. So I do meditate. I'd try to take the deep, there's some exercises that the doctors have me do, but I'm still kind of a, I mean, my wife would say I'm insane, but I've got a ton of weapons in my car and in my house. Like, I'm ready for war at any time. And it's, it's not something I want to do, it's just something that I have to do. Is that there's a difference between one and half, right? That,

Vance Crowe [00:39:48] Yeah.

Morgan Freed [00:39:49] I ha for my calmness. I have to have that stuff. And why? Because I 100% believe that at any moment there's, I can, something bad can happen, I gotta be prepared. So because of that, that's when I started really, really training for real.

Vance Crowe [00:40:08] Do you view your motivated by fear as an advantage? I mean, I don't know that that's, that's a hell of a,

Morgan Freed [00:40:15] I would, I'm not motivated so much by fear as I'm motivated by to, I'm not fear's a, a weird word to, it's good to have fear. I'm motivated more by, I'm a race car that's always on, on red. I am literally ready to go at a moment's notice at any time. So that has now because of that, you know, there's a lot of, I'm a, I'm kind of like that alert.

Vance Crowe [00:40:41] I mean, if you're on alert, that's, that's

Morgan Freed [00:40:44] Imagine, imagine pulling the, filling the gun barrel with sticks and pulling that trigger. I'm that bullet just waiting to blast out just in case.

Vance Crowe [00:40:54] So when you said you started going to the gym, you were learning how to martial arts at this point? Or you're just hitting the the weights

Morgan Freed [00:41:00] Both. So I started training in DC at, at a, at, they had a, they had a gym on base. There was a guy who knew boxing, didn't really know much, but he knew more than I did. And I just asked him to show me stuff and he started showing me. Then I got stationed in Italy. And then from there my fitness got really serious into weight training. 'cause I met a really good friend who was, I call him a silverback gorilla. I love him. He's a prison guard in New York. He's a massive man. He took me from what I was and taught me how to work out. And then in 2006, so I was in the Navy from oh one to oh six, got out, went to college in Carbondale. And that's where I found my first real, well I, I started, well I once first found my first real coaches. So I started with a bunch of prison guards who were training MMA and they taught, you know, they started, it was all nogi at the time. So they were teaching me, you know, I posts how to, you know, the dirty, dirty stuff. Which honestly to my day is my favorite. So when people come and do, like, if somebody wants to train with me, I want to teach you the dirty tricks. Like here's how we throw a headbutt, here's how we can stick my thumb in your eye. Now Coach Mike can do all that stuff too. I just love it. So I started with them because their style didn't need to be so much self-defense. It needed to be more, I've gotta murder this.

Vance Crowe [00:42:18] I'm about to be murdered. I better murder. You decide go, it's go time. Yeah.

Morgan Freed [00:42:21] So I started with them and then there was a guy who became my first juujitsu coach who finally started training. And then I started training with him. And then, I mean it was snowball effect. I, because I was so, and the funny thing is I didn't even know about that. I had this kind of inside me. I just knew I had to do it. So I just trained and trained and trained two, three times a day as much as I could. And that still goes to this day where I train as as much as I can because one, I love it. But two underneath that there is that, that stuff that I deal with on a daily basis. And for me, and I'll tell this to anybody out there who has PTSD Juujitsu was saved my life. And I think coach said the same thing for him. It saved his life. It saved my life. I needed a place to feel safe but also learn how to really fight to defend myself so I could feel safe outside of the gym.

Vance Crowe [00:43:21] People that have never, like if you're 30 years old and you've never wrestled or tussled or rolled with anybody, yes of course you're gonna get thrown around. But the feeling, the experience of knowing how to control or manipulate another person, I'm not even very good. But just that millimeter that you learn from it. Yeah.

Morgan Freed [00:43:40] Makes

Vance Crowe [00:43:40] You feel like

Morgan Freed [00:43:41] Confidence.

Vance Crowe [00:43:42] Yes.

Morgan Freed [00:43:42] Self-esteem. I love it for kids. You'll walk with your head a little higher, you'll feel a little safer. You know, I can go to target now with my daughter a little bit longer. You know, those are, that's what I got, got out training. Is it cool that I can do an arm barn? Sure. It's great. What do I get out of it knowing that I can be more Morgan around my family. So that was my brick incident. Now when I got done with.

Vance Crowe [00:44:08] So say more about that. You can be more Morgan around your family. What do you mean

Morgan Freed [00:44:12] Less of that redco on red. Let that, that race corps on red, less of that, less of that guy who's paranoid, worried about getting attacked. You know, that's what jujitsu gets. When I come home from a hard day of training, what I feel is mental exhaustion and it's nice to be able to turn my brain off.

Vance Crowe [00:44:31] Oh, I am.

Morgan Freed [00:44:32] That's what

Vance Crowe [00:44:32] I'm a hundred percent with you. There is no form of meditation. No. That is cleaner than when you walk out of a Jiujitsu studio and you've just, just gone Right. As hard as you can go.

Morgan Freed [00:44:42] And I think any phys that any type of activity that's that physical can do that I just happen to find fighting as mine.

Vance Crowe [00:44:50] I mean, I've done, you know, I've, I've been running and I've done lifting right. Several years, but I never did anything right

Morgan Freed [00:44:55] Until

Vance Crowe [00:44:56] You did Juujitsu.

Morgan Freed [00:44:57] Yep. It's crazy, right? Wrestling's the same thing. You know, it's drive go charge. You

Vance Crowe [00:45:01] Have kids, are they in Juujitsu?

Morgan Freed [00:45:02] I do. My both my boys did train with Coach Mike for a couple years. They're taking time off with kids. You have to be careful. You don't wanna push 'em because they'll never do it. Right. You can't push a kid to do a sport like that. That's that hard.

Vance Crowe [00:45:14] That's right.

Morgan Freed [00:45:14] And I tell parents, look, if you're gonna push your kid, you better get on the mat too to know what it feels like. So you have to be gentle with kids. Let 'em do it. If they want to take some time off, take some time off and then hope they come back. But also realize you are not your kid. It is not. Do I want my kids to eventually come back to jujitsu? I do. I wanna train with my boys when they're 18. We can go compete. I will do all those things with them. But this is their life. It's not mine. I can't make them do, if my kid wants to do ballet, then by God, we're gonna do ballet till his feet fall off. That's what he

Vance Crowe [00:45:47] Wants. How hard was it when they first said, dad, we don't wanna do Juujitsu.

Morgan Freed [00:45:51] I was okay with it. My wife is an amazing woman. Her story is incredible. Like she, she would love her story too. It's also a, a powerful, but she is the smartest, most amazing woman I've ever met. And she's, she walks me through a lot of things and tells me and teaches me, and luckily I've learned this, and this is all your male listeners, if you understand that your wife is smarter than you and you actually understand it, you'll have a much better life. I

Vance Crowe [00:46:18] Mean, like,

Morgan Freed [00:46:18] Just facts, man.

Vance Crowe [00:46:19] The, when I began to truly realize how much of a partner my wife could be like, Hey, if I actually tell her what I'm concerned about, instead of just keeping it to myself, right? If I tell her, if I lay out the problems, she will help walk me through that situation and a level that I, I couldn't do without

Morgan Freed [00:46:37] Her. My my wife is rogue color smart. So she's a doctor. She has her PhD in biomechanical science. Her story is, I'll give you a quick before I jump into my part three. She was a single mom with three kids and had built a massive business on her own. That's how incredible she is. She is. I always say, whatever my wife says, do it. Trust me, you'll be better off. Now sometimes I don't listen to my own self

Vance Crowe [00:47:02] Self, but that's, I'm

Morgan Freed [00:47:03] Allowed. I'm, I'm the husband. But she is, she's, she's an she's incredible, incredible. But I know that, and if you know it, you'll have a better life. Learn the love language. Read a lot of books. Trust me, it's well worth your time to know that stuff.

Vance Crowe [00:47:19] We learned a thing really early on in our marriage called mirroring.

Morgan Freed [00:47:23] Yeah.

Vance Crowe [00:47:24] Are you familiar with that? I don't know that one. So, so this is it. It sounds really weird, but I, I'll do it. But you get into a disagreement, right? Okay. Where you notice that tensions are ratcheting up 'cause somebody's voice gets raised or they start talking faster.

Morgan Freed [00:47:36] Right?

Vance Crowe [00:47:37] And so what we do is we say, okay, wait a second.

Morgan Freed [00:47:40] What did you

Vance Crowe [00:47:41] Just hear me say?

Morgan Freed [00:47:42] That's good. And

Vance Crowe [00:47:43] Then she'll say, I heard you say this. Right?

Morgan Freed [00:47:45] And,

Vance Crowe [00:47:47] And, and if she's wrong, right? Like, I didn't mean to say that. I didn't mean like that. Right. Then we like can go back and visit that. Yeah. And if we ever have to, we can sit down and do an entire thing where it's like, I'm gonna speak and then you repeat back for

Morgan Freed [00:47:58] Me, you know, communication takes a lot of work. You have to wanna do it. You have to be willing to do it. You have to read books, you have to learn. You can't just be like, oh, I'm a great communicator. Well, are you really? Are you listening? Or are you waiting to talk? Right. Slow down. That's, I think you're, I think that's a great and

Vance Crowe [00:48:15] The way to do it and the ability to decide for, for a couple to decide we are going to endure Having a little bit of conflict now to, to resolve why is this happening? Right. And how do we fix it? It saves mountains Yes. Of fighting in the future. Yep. We started instituting. Do you guys do family meeting? Do you do a like a radio? We do family.

Morgan Freed [00:48:34] We, not so much family meeting, but we do, we do do family like prayer.

Vance Crowe [00:48:38] Okay. So

Morgan Freed [00:48:39] That's kind of our meeting. And my wife and I takes turns laying with the, the boys. My daughter's 14, so don't lay with her. But she she'll for each one they get. So every night I'll lay with Knox before he goes to bed. And I just, we talk, tell me about your day. So that's our family meeting is just letting them tell you what they did today, how they felt. Good questions to ask your kids are not how was your day at school? But anything make you smile today. Did anything make you sad? Is there anything you know now that you didn't know yesterday?

Vance Crowe [00:49:11] Oh, that's good.

Morgan Freed [00:49:12] So it opens up conversation that they're then willing. So that's what, what's different

Vance Crowe [00:49:16] About that than saying the other way.

Morgan Freed [00:49:18] How was your day at school? Yeah, it was fine. That's your answer. Every parent, every person who's a parent will get that answer from their kid. But if you say, is there anything that made you smile? Well, you're gonna get a story. Let me tell you, man, today I was in luck with Dylan and he farted so loud and everybody giggled you. That's the moments you wanna cherish. 'cause you're gonna be like, that's funny and it's cool. And your kid told you that. So those are great questions to ask your kids.

Vance Crowe [00:49:44] Yeah, man, that's great.

Morgan Freed [00:49:46] And

Vance Crowe [00:49:46] When you are teaching them to pray, right, because it's not intuitive necessarily, right? What are you,

Morgan Freed [00:49:52] What are you

Vance Crowe [00:49:53] Teaching them? Should be their relationship with God?

Morgan Freed [00:49:57] You know, it's, it's, it's, it's a hard, that's a hard answer is it's, I don't really so much teach 'em to pray. We're very, it's more like, what do you want to, what do you wanna pray? Or what do you wanna talk about? So a lot of times Knox will tell me something made him mad. And I'll say, all right, well let's pray that tomorrow's not a bad day. Dear God. I always say this with knocks, dear God, please, please bless mom, dad, grandpa, grandpa, cats, dogs, lizards, and the pet alligator I have under your bed. We don't have any cats or dogs or lizards or we, we have dogs, but whatever. Amen. So that's our quick prayer to God. I go and then I'll say, okay, dear God, please let Knox know that he is loved and he is cared for, that he is special. And if he ever needs to talk about anything, let him know that Morgan is here to listen. Amen. That's a prayer. Because it's just saying, here I am. If you wanna talk, we can. And if you don't, that's okay. Too gentle. You gotta be gentle with

Vance Crowe [00:50:53] Everybody.

Morgan Freed [00:50:54] Wow. But

Vance Crowe [00:50:56] That's a real flow kind of state because it says to the child, you know your exact intentions and as long as you are being as honest as you can, yep. That child is going to hear you talking with the, with with the person that you believe you serve, you know God. And that they get to overhear that conversation. That's exceptional.

Morgan Freed [00:51:17] It's, yeah, it's a lot of work. I mean, you just gotta decide to do it though. Once again, it's

Vance Crowe [00:51:21] Work because

Morgan Freed [00:51:22] It's

Vance Crowe [00:51:22] Time or it's work because sometimes you're,

Morgan Freed [00:51:24] You'll forget about it. You get busy, there's laundry to be folded, there's lunches to be made. There's all kinds of things in your life that will get in your way. But you have to stop and slow down. You know, they'll say Stop. Stop and smell the roses. Right. That's a great saying. But how about just stop and breathe. Be grateful for what you already have in your life. You know, a lot of times we're, we move so fast, we forget all the wonderful things that we've been given for me. So after I got out of the military, I started running YMCAs. So they hired me as a personal trainer. Originally I was gonna be a teacher. I have two degrees. I went to college, I got my second DUI in college, but I got a degree in public relations and another degree in elementary education. So finished college. Did that,

Vance Crowe [00:52:07] What did you think you were gonna do with that?

Morgan Freed [00:52:09] Public relations. I thought I would do something, working in some kind of field where I was either supporting someone, teaching, some kind of being their voice to the world. But I had a real job, military and I didn't wanna go to work. Luckily I still had money in my GA bill because I did three years of college full ride. So I got my public relations degree in about two years. So you're given four years of free college. So I did two years and I'm done. Well, I'm a rich college student. I was, had saved up about $30,000 from the Navy. I was getting paid about $1,500 a month to go to college.

Vance Crowe [00:52:45] Oh my God, that's so much kid. And I much more than I was working at the rec

Morgan Freed [00:52:48] Kid. I was working at the bar at the, at the rec center and at the bar. So I was rich in Carbondale. And I'm like, well, I'm not going back to work. I'm gonna get another degree. So I got a second degree in elementary education. 'cause I like children, I like teaching children. I loved it. Got outta college. And this is where, God, this is funny. You know, this is God's plan, right? So I'm like, okay, I'm gonna go put in some applications to be a school teacher. That's what my father did. That's what I'll do. But what is my skillset? Well, for the last seven years I've been trained in martial arts and lifting weights. Gotten pretty good at it. I ran the rec in college. I'll go work at a y thinking I gotta work. Why I look for job, look for work. 'cause I had moved back home and I had been gone 11 years, moved back home. So I'm working at the Y looking for a teaching job. Well, I took the YMCA from $15,000 a year to 60,000, $70,000 a year in personal training. So in six month time, it was actually six months, they went from small potatoes to big potatoes. And people always ask me, how did I do that? And the truth is, I'm passionate. I'm, I care about people and I wanna see 'em succeed. People saw that in me. So everybody would train with me. So I had all these clients and then I went to, I realized I wasn't getting, you know, I was making minimum. I was getting whatever I got paid as a trainer. Well I wanted full-time, I wanted benefits, I wanted this. So I went to the boss and said, Hey, I want full-time. And he said, well, show me the numbers. So I printed out the budget and said, you made $15,000 last year and the six months I've been here, you made $60,000.

Morgan Freed [00:54:21] He looked at it and went, alright, fulltime, signed it, signed the sheet full-time, came in, got the job next day where we talked salary. Then from there they gave me another YMC and ran. So now I'm running two YMCAs, very content training, jiujitsu day practice and night practice.

Vance Crowe [00:54:39] With who? At this point?

Morgan Freed [00:54:40] At this time it was Mike.

Vance Crowe [00:54:41] Okay. So

Morgan Freed [00:54:41] Mike got recommended me by my first JIUJITSU coach. So I came to Mike as a force, ripe blue belt, started training with Mike. We were, I think I was training

Vance Crowe [00:54:49] So you can defend yourself. Yeah. But you're not in the upper ranks. Not

Morgan Freed [00:54:52] In the upper ranks. And I moved here in 2009. So in 2009 is when I met my met Mike came to him as a four stripe blue belt. And luckily since I was working at the Y, I'd get there in the morning, train some clients, work out, go to day practice, come back to the Y workout, go to night practice my brain for my PTSD and all that stuff. Very happy y working out, training, working, going home, going to bed. At that point, I think at that point I had quit drinking. I had quit all, every, all bad things had stopped just because I had gotten so into fitness. And then I'm training with Mike for, for however long I was. And I'm still there. I'm now 35. So I moved home. I was 31. I had already had about five years of martial arts training. Now under my belt now I've got another five. I'm 35. I think I was a per probably a three stripe, four stripe, purple belt around three. Are

Vance Crowe [00:55:49] You still living with your parents? No.

Morgan Freed [00:55:51] No. So at 35 I'd always wanted to get married and have kids. And it just never happened. Never happened. For whatever reason. It just, I'd like to say there is a reason I, I remember one day at the YI surrendered, I gave up, I said, you know what, God, I'm not gonna get married. I'm not gonna have kids. I'll look into adoption. I wanna be a dad.

Vance Crowe [00:56:15] What? When, so you've mentioned this, there's two questions there, but the first one is, you've mentioned like really liking kids and being around kids,

Morgan Freed [00:56:23] Right?

Vance Crowe [00:56:24] I feel like we live in a weird time where men have to be very careful about saying that

Morgan Freed [00:56:29] You do. You just have to be rough around them, rough around kids. Does that make sense?

Vance Crowe [00:56:34] No, not at all. I'm, I, I wouldn't, can't, in today's climate, I wouldn't touch a child.

Morgan Freed [00:56:40] So I've been, I substitute teach for fun. You can't, there's a way to talk to children and parents without coming off as a creepy person. And I believe it's being a little rough around the edges. If you look at me, you prob you know, I'm kind of like, ah, look at your kid over there. He is doing all, you can't spell. But he is doing all right. You know, if you can come off like that, you have a, you have a better chance of not getting in trouble. I don't know. That's a very, it's a very weird way to kind of say it, but kids always like me. I like kids. I

Vance Crowe [00:57:14] Believe it. I mean, I like my own kids more than

Morgan Freed [00:57:16] I like your kids. Just the truth. But I mean, there's certain things you don't do. You don't let 'em sit your lamp. You don't, when they go to hug you, you turn sideways. Like there's certain stuff you do. But I always liked being a mentor. It's always something I enjoyed. Yeah. So I, at 35 given up, you know, I said, all right, God, I'm not gonna get it. I'm not gonna have kids. Here's what it is, man. I'll adopt. I'll look into it. Of course, when you surrender, that's when God was pretty much like, awesome. Let me introduce you to your wife and your three kids. So I met my wife Jeanette, freed, and she had three children. They were two, four, and eight when I met him. And you know, her story, like I said, it's different than mine. It's very powerful than what she did. But I meet this woman and you know, I literally, I've fallen in love with with her. And I had prayed for God to give me a family forever. You know, I mean, I want to, wanted to get married since I've been 28. I wanted a family, but I wasn't gonna wear marry the wrong one just to do it. I was, I wanted, I remember before I met Jeanette, if I'd go out on dates, I'd be like, so what's your retirement plan and how much, what's your 401k like? How was that point in my life? So I meet Jeanette and I prayed to God for a family. And when we started dating, you know, then I moved in and it started getting serious. I realized God gave me a family. But the problem is I was never around. I was working 60 hours a week at the YMCA full-time. It's normal. 40, 50, 60 hours a week. And I was at jujitsu all night long.

Morgan Freed [00:58:48] So I prayed to God to give me a family. And when I tell my story, people ask my story about the business side. Here's what I know. I know that those boys at two and four, they have a father. But you know, he gets 'em every other weekend. They needed to see that. Some men are strong, some men are loyal, some men do what they say they're gonna do. And some men, some men can be what you wanna be in life. And her daughter needed to see the same thing. You know, I, I tell people when I tell my story, it's, it's funny as I, like I said, I was given a family, but imagine Christmas time, it's, imagine a beautiful house. You're inside. There's this roaring fire inside is your wife and your kids, right? That's your family. But you're outside and you're wiping off the glass and you're looking in 'cause you're part of that family, but you're not, you're not there, right? You're your every dad who works his brains off to provide for that. Now that's a great dad. You can, that is a phenomenal man or woman. You know, you roles can be reverse whatever. Or it could be a single mom killing herself. But for me, I was the man who was working my brains off. And there was my family. I would only be around them at nighttime. I'd be gone before they'd go to school. I, you know, I just wasn't there. Why? I was training so much. I was working so much. And I realized that God gave me a family, but I wasn't a part of it. Luckily.

Morgan Freed [01:00:19] And this is truly, truly just what it is. My wife was helping people from home full-time with their business. She was helping people with health, with weight loss, with energy, with DNA testing, whatever it is they wanted or needed. But she was doing it from home through the phone, contacting how, how can I help you? What are you doing today? One person at a time. And I realized, you know, I was doing the same thing she was, but I was hours for dollars over here. I was at the Y all day pushups, all day hours for dollars. And I remember one night we're laying in bed and she, she got paid and it was substantial. And she goes, Morgan, I think I'm finally gonna get outta debt. She had $300,000 in debt when I met her. And she started crying. And I realized, you know, if she can do it, why can't I? Why can't I do it? She's helping people. I can help people. She's compassionate, she cares. I care. I can do what she did. And I can come home and be a stay at home dad. I can be part of this family. I can wake up when they wake up. I can take 'em to school. I can do all the things that I want to do as a father. And I always say I, because I never want anybody to think that what they're doing is not okay. You know, the dad who goes to work all day long, God bless him. God bless him for putting in those hours, providing for their family. Single mom who works two jobs to put a roof over her head, but has to put in daycare. God bless her for being amazing. But I saw what my wife did and I said, you know what, I can do that too.

Morgan Freed [01:01:56] So I don't like to cuss, but I'll make it. I like to cuss to make point. So I got my ass to work in six months. I made enough money that I was comfortable quitting my job.

Vance Crowe [01:02:07] You mean by, by working more at the gym?

Morgan Freed [01:02:09] By working the bus? Yeah. No, no. The business. The

Vance Crowe [01:02:12] Business. The

Morgan Freed [01:02:13] Business. My wife and I do quit my full-time job in six months. And I have been a stay at home dad. My mom's or my wife's been a stay-at-home mom for eight years now. So.

Vance Crowe [01:02:25] So you both work from home? Both

Morgan Freed [01:02:26] Work from home. So my kids are eight, 10, and 14.

Vance Crowe [01:02:28] Okay.

Morgan Freed [01:02:30] I have, I do Tuesday lunches with my son Beckham. And being part of their lives at this level, they're gonna look back and re always think it's normal for dad to be at home all the time. And luckily we were blessed with an opportunity in the business that we do to be able to do that.

Vance Crowe [01:02:50] What is your business?

Morgan Freed [01:02:51] So the company is called ID Life. We're, I'll have to pull it up 'cause I don't know it by heart. Oh, there's my picture in my face. So if you were to, if you, if you were interested, you'd go to freed.id life.com. So that's it there. But what we do is we do, we help people with Think fitness. So you'll come, let's say you come to me, Morgan, I wanna feel better, what can I do? Awesome. I'm gonna send you a link to take a free health assessment. So you'll take this health assessment, it goes to five or 10,000 doctor peer reviews. And it's pretty intensive. It's free, but do you smoke, do you drink or are you white? Where are you from? Blah blah blah, blah, blah. Are you, do you have diabetes in your family? All this stuff. So you take this test and then we will send you back based on you, Vance, this is what we think you need. Cool. Get it. Don't get it. I don't care. You took the test. You want my help. You know, what do you think of the test? Oh Morgan, I like it. It says I need more fish oil. Duh. You're an American, you don't eat fish. So then we talk about it. Then some people can take it further and do a DNA test. So let's say you're like, okay, I really want to know what's going on with my health. I want to do a DNA. So then you'll swab your mouth, mail it in, it sends you a 45 page HIPAA compliant form. So I can't see it. That will say based on you. Exactly. And your DNA, you need to do this for weight loss, this for weight gain. Carbs are not your friends. You need more fol light. It's super

Vance Crowe [01:04:19] Interesting. I guess I was not aware that the DNA science baby, that the, well, so I actually worked at, you know, the largest biotech company in the, in the, in the world for a little while. And the, well, I don't know in the world, in, in agriculture certainly. And I was unaware that the genetic sequencing was at the level that it could tell you it's insane. Should get, it's insane.

Morgan Freed [01:04:39] So my wife is,

Vance Crowe [01:04:41] She

Morgan Freed [01:04:41] Did not like her DNA test. I mean it's said she has slow weight loss and she has to do this for weight training and she needed more fol light, which is actually pretty common in a lot of people. I'd have to pull it up to look at it. Mine on the other hand is like, dude, you're killing it. You've got great genetics, you have easy weight loss. Like, I love to rub that in her face in a nice way. But what I like about it is everybody's different. You know, I can send, and this is just kind of a fun business thing, but I see these people in the Walmart aisle and they're just grabbing stuff and I'm like, God, I wanna help 'em. But I don't know 'em. They think they need this and they think they need this. And the truth is they may not like, I don't know, you're different than me. So I can't put you on a regiment that I take because what I take is different. I'm not as tall as you. I don't, maybe I don't weigh as much as you maybe or whatever. We're different. So because we're different, why not have science come into play where I can say, based on science, this is what you need. Not what bro Science Morgan thinks.

Vance Crowe [01:05:46] So how would you differentiate the advice that you guys give from, so I had the president of the associate, the Academy of Nutrition and Dietetics on here. And how do you think about your nutrition relative to like what they're doing over there?

Morgan Freed [01:06:01] Well, what I would have to know exactly what they're doing over there. Well,

Vance Crowe [01:06:03] Just the registered dieticians. Okay. Like, so if I, if if, if they hear somebody that's not a registered dietician giving advice, they get all

Morgan Freed [01:06:12] Up in arms, don't they?

Vance Crowe [01:06:12] Oh man. They get mad.

Morgan Freed [01:06:13] Well, look how many diets are out there right here. The, what I've noticed nutrition nutritionists want is more fruits and vegetables. Great. Duh. Who doesn't? Three meals a day, two snacks a day, whatever that that work. Here's the thing that works for a lot of people. It's great once you does fit all. But not everybody's foot is the same. If their nutrition nutritionists were pretty much the end, all that end all, well we'd all be doing it. And some people would say, you would never hear somebody say, well, I tried it and didn't lose any weight, or I don't feel better. Well maybe it didn't work. Some people are keto, some people are not keto. Some people do. They only eat one meal a day. Some people eat two meals a day. Some people do plant-based, some people do a mix, some do Atkins. So what I would tell the nutritionist is, I love what you do. I think it's great that you're helping people. That's for sure. What I do is very similar, except I'm not gonna just put everybody on the same plan. I'm gonna let them kind of decide their own plan based on what they think they need. And we're gonna figure it out together.

Vance Crowe [01:07:21] I mean, I, I think that they, I that's interesting. I think that they would say that they put everybody on individual plans too.

Morgan Freed [01:07:28] They doish I mean, I've never heard a nutritionist say, you need to be more keto, less carb or more carb, less keto. Right? So it's, it's really hard to say what they're gonna do. But then again, I knew on nutritionist, if I'm just a nutritionist, they're just gonna ask you a lot of questions, which is great. I'm gonna do some DNA testing and we're going to actually get some DNA results and see what that says. I know a lot of nutritionists who do things like that, but they're still, there's still a, once you fits all.

Vance Crowe [01:07:59] So how I think, how is your business going for you? It's you and your wife and me and my wife. Is this a larger company? Yep. Or this is you guys? So

Morgan Freed [01:08:05] The company is based outta Texas and we would be considered how, what we're, how do I even, I would be like, not a spokesperson, but I'm a direct to consumer supplier. So my job really is to meet people, talk to 'em, see if I can help 'em. And if they're interested, we'll go from there and see if it's something they wanna do. If not, it's okay. It's,

Vance Crowe [01:08:29] How long have you guys been doing this?

Morgan Freed [01:08:31] We've been in the business for about my wife for about eight years. Me for about five, five or six.

Vance Crowe [01:08:37] Wow. So

Morgan Freed [01:08:38] She did it before I met her.

Vance Crowe [01:08:39] Okay. Yep. And is she still, you said she was a, is she a medical doctor or you said she

Morgan Freed [01:08:44] Has her

Vance Crowe [01:08:45] Doctorate in

Morgan Freed [01:08:45] Doctorate in chiropractic. Okay.

Vance Crowe [01:08:47] And

Morgan Freed [01:08:47] Her PhD in biomechanical science.

Vance Crowe [01:08:50] Wow. Like I

Morgan Freed [01:08:50] Said, she's much smarter than I am.

Vance Crowe [01:08:51] Where did she go to school?

Morgan Freed [01:08:53] I believe Logan.

Vance Crowe [01:08:54] Okay.

Morgan Freed [01:08:54] So

Vance Crowe [01:08:56] Interesting. Yeah. I'm my, my wife is a doctor to physical therapy. You're right. Yep. And that is an experience having somebody that knows dramatically more than you do.

Morgan Freed [01:09:04] She doesn't make me call her doctor, which is nice. That

Vance Crowe [01:09:06] Is,

Morgan Freed [01:09:06] My mom's a doctor. My, my sister's a doctor. So everybody in my family's doctors, I'm like the black sheep.

Vance Crowe [01:09:11] So when you ended up leaving the, the personal training, the YMCA and you move into this, are you black belt at this point?

Morgan Freed [01:09:20] No. I got, I think I was a, at that point I was probably at least a brown belt.

Vance Crowe [01:09:25] Okay. So, so for people that don't know, white, blue, purple, brown belt, purple, brown, black.

Morgan Freed [01:09:29] I've been a black belt now for about a year and a half.

Vance Crowe [01:09:31] Oh, okay. So, so relatively recent

Morgan Freed [01:09:33] Time flies, right? Relatively recent in the 15 years I've been doing it.

Vance Crowe [01:09:37] What do you think that that's right?

Morgan Freed [01:09:38] 15 years. Yeah.

Vance Crowe [01:09:40] Wow. Do you think everybody should expect a 15 year journey?

Morgan Freed [01:09:45] The average is 10 to 15. So I actually got my black belt in 13 years. I just say 15. 'cause it's just, you know, you do some nogi in there and whatever. Right. But everybody's different. It all depends on how much you do it. Like I didn't, I really never got into juujitsu to get a black belt. I got into it to learn how to kick some ass. A hundred percent. I wanted to learn how to hurt people so they didn't hurt me first. I mean, it's just, it is what it is. Like I, you go back to my world and my brain, everybody wants to kill you. Everybody's out to hurt you. So I better learn how to hurt them first.

Vance Crowe [01:10:16] Yeah. Everybody's gotta have a reason to show up to Juujitsu. You have to. Right.

Morgan Freed [01:10:21] And

Vance Crowe [01:10:21] It doesn't, you doesn't have to be well formed in your mind. You may get there and be like, I think I'm gonna be pulled. Yep. But you don't keep coming back unless you've got something you're trying to do. I,

Morgan Freed [01:10:30] I'll, I tell people a lot of times I don't care if you're motivated. I literally do not care. Great. You're motivated to get in shape. Good for you. Today I'm so happy. It's awesome to be motivated. Awesome. But motivation comes and goes.

Vance Crowe [01:10:42] Yeah. Discipline is the only thing.

Morgan Freed [01:10:43] Discipline.

Vance Crowe [01:10:44] That's right.

Morgan Freed [01:10:44] There's many a times where I don't wanna go train or don't, dude, my arm is killing me right now. I'm going to tape it up and I'm gonna go train. 'cause it doesn't matter doing it, do it anyways. That is my tip of the world.

Vance Crowe [01:10:57] Do it anyways. I I ran 500 miles this year. Yeah, that's

Morgan Freed [01:11:00] Crazy.

Vance Crowe [01:11:01] And I'd never tell you not doing that like that. But I can tell you that there, like most of the time I didn't want to go.

Morgan Freed [01:11:07] Right.

Vance Crowe [01:11:07] But I can't think of a single time when I got done working out that I wasn't glad I did

Morgan Freed [01:11:12] It. It's, you know, the running that amount of miles is, it's, that is the definition of just pure willpower. Like there comes a point probably where you're like, dude, I do not, I do not wanna run my knees hurt, my joints hurt. I'm doing it anyways.

Vance Crowe [01:11:28] The hardest mileage for me to run out of the whole thing.

Morgan Freed [01:11:31] Yeah.

Vance Crowe [01:11:31] Was the last 30 miles. Right.

Morgan Freed [01:11:33] Because

Vance Crowe [01:11:34] I was like, I know I can get it right. I could go out and get it in three runs if I really wanted to. But, you know, what am I gonna do once I get past that goal? And actually it's a problem I'm working on right now, now, which is thousand, you think?

Morgan Freed [01:11:48] Yeah. I

Vance Crowe [01:11:48] Don't know. 800.

Morgan Freed [01:11:50] I

Vance Crowe [01:11:50] Don't know. I How do, how do you go about choosing goals? Like, you work with a lot of people and how do they, do they come to you with goals? They do. Do they know what they want? They

Morgan Freed [01:11:58] Do. A lot of people first. It's all about baby steps, I think. And I think this is probably a saying long term goals, short term, what is it? Long term goals, short term kind of gains. Meaning we want, we're gonna set a big goal for sure. I love setting big goals, but let's have little bitty steps along the way. You wanna lose a hundred pounds? Awesome. Let's start with 10. I'm gonna celebrate your brains off when you use 10. I'm a big believer in celebrating people. Celebrate 'em, shout 'em out. Tell 'em how proud you are. That will motivate people, which is great, but it also lets 'em know that you're with them. So somebody comes to me with a goal, we're gonna find out what that goal is, and then we're gonna see one, is it realistic? And two, I'm gonna be honest, how long it's gonna take. You know, if you're, if you're 300 pounds and you tell me you want to do a body, but you want to be 150 in a year, I'm gonna look and say it's, that's not really realistic. I mean, is it possible? For sure. But why don't we just start with, you know, 50, let's start there, let's see how you feel. But we're gonna set a big goal and then we're gonna slowly see where we go. And then it's just day by day, kinda like an alcoholic, you know, every day you quit drinking is a, it's a hard day. You've gotta, every day is a new day. Right? Same thing with anything you do in your life. Let's say, let's say you have a business and there's just one day where you, something happens, it struggles, you don't get it done. Cool. Monday is a new day. I tell people Monday is the best day of the week because that's the day to start over. Don't look at Monday as the worst day.

Morgan Freed [01:13:29] Monday is the best day. You know what days? I hate Sunday. I don't want, I don't need a Sunday in my life. I could go Monday through Friday, start right back over on Monday only. I mean, I like Saturdays, I will admit, but Sunday, there's no such thing as a rest day. No such thing in anything you do. Don't rest. Go, go

Vance Crowe [01:13:47] Farther, go faster. So whatcha you doing on a Sunday? When you say no rest, are you getting

Morgan Freed [01:13:50] You blowing

Vance Crowe [01:13:51] A whistle in your kid's bedroom being like, get up, we're going.

Morgan Freed [01:13:53] No, no, I'm, I'm pretty chill. I mean, we get up, we go to church or we listen to whatever church on tv. I go to the gym, I work out, go hang out, hang with my family, but I still work. I still do something. Yeah.

Vance Crowe [01:14:06] You know, it's, I definitely don't feel better if I take a Sunday and I'm just like, I'm gonna gonna lay around all day. I don't it

Morgan Freed [01:14:12] No days off, man. I don't believe in days off.

Vance Crowe [01:14:14] What are you reading these days?

Morgan Freed [01:14:17] I am reading, I just recently reread the love languages, which is my favorite book to read. Because when you have a wife and a family, it's good to know your kids love languages. But kids love languages change as they get older. You know, when my kids were two, four and eight, you know what their love language was? Gifts. Gifts, gifts. Now it's different. Now my, my, I would say my youngest is quality time. My middle one is probably quality time, physical touch. And then my daughter is, I would say she's probably words of affirmation.

Vance Crowe [01:14:50] Ma'am, when you said I, I read love languages, I was like, you're full

Morgan Freed [01:14:54] Of shit. Love the

Vance Crowe [01:14:54] Love it. But either you love it, you're right. I can see how it would apply.

Morgan Freed [01:14:58] My wife recommended me that book, when I met her, she read this book. She is acts of service. So I always try to do laundry. I always do all the chores around the house as much as I can. That's how she knows I love her. Cool. Do it. You want me to do dishes? No, she doesn't let me do the ditches, dish dishes. I'm kind of a mess. But I do the laundry. I try to do all

Vance Crowe [01:15:17] Things, anything. You do it full speed.

Morgan Freed [01:15:18] Yeah. Right.

Vance Crowe [01:15:19] You're doing the shoveling and

Morgan Freed [01:15:21] So yeah, yeah. Of service. I am, I'm probably quality time and words of affirmation. So I know my love languages. And then I just read,

Vance Crowe [01:15:34] Are you a little concerned that if you were really good at love languages, that you could manipulate people?

Morgan Freed [01:15:40] I'm sure you could if you wanted. I'm sure you could manipulate people anytime you really wanted to. I mean, that's something that's, that's just people in general. I mean, you

Vance Crowe [01:15:50] Know, like, because I think about that a lot because I give, yeah. I, I, I have these things on Fridays sometimes where I talk about communicating with people.

Morgan Freed [01:15:57] Right?

Vance Crowe [01:15:57] Right. Like how to do it better. Right. And I'm, I'm always a little bit leery because what I'm really trying to do is to lower the barriers that people have, right? To say I can't do it.

Morgan Freed [01:16:08] Right.

Vance Crowe [01:16:09] So that they can, right.

Morgan Freed [01:16:10] So, but

Vance Crowe [01:16:10] You could take that to an extreme.

Morgan Freed [01:16:12] Are you using it for good or evil? There's your answer. If you're using it for good, it's 100% Okay. If you're using it for evil, well, it's not the best. Right.

Vance Crowe [01:16:23] Do you have a definition of evil?

Morgan Freed [01:16:26] I don't necessarily have a definition for evil.

Vance Crowe [01:16:29] I heard one that was really good. What was, what was yours? The one that I heard was the creation of suffering where it's not needed, you know, or the addition of suffering. Yeah. So I, I, I heard Jordan Peterson, this. Right?

Morgan Freed [01:16:41] I like him

Vance Crowe [01:16:42] Psychologist talking about it. And I'm sure, I think it was, he's good. It came from the Gulag Archipelago, that book about Soviet Russia, right. Where the people were living in these prison camps. And I think that that makes a, a ton of sense. It does. Like it's real evil when there's somebody suffering and you go to put more on them

Morgan Freed [01:17:00] Somehow I have a belief that words are more powerful than anything else in the world. So I hate that saying sticks and stones will break my bones and words will never hurt me. I think that's a hundred percent opposite. I think words have more power and can do more damage than anything else.

Vance Crowe [01:17:20] Well, that's all we are thoughts and ideas, right? So if, I mean, you can monkey around. If you can get in there and climb around and hammer somebody

Morgan Freed [01:17:27] Saying hurtful things to people can last a lifetime. A broken arm can heal,

Vance Crowe [01:17:32] You know, but you do need to teach kids like, yeah, hey, you know, he called you a dummy. Right? Like, you gotta get over that. There's

Morgan Freed [01:17:37] Different, because

Vance Crowe [01:17:38] You can't do anything about it.

Morgan Freed [01:17:39] Right. There's a, there's a difference. Do you think because

Vance Crowe [01:17:42] You are like affirmations that people can hurt you because if you're open to being Oh, for sure. Like, I appreciate that about you.

Morgan Freed [01:17:51] I'm pretty thick skinned, which is nice, but I still have feelings. You know, I'm still human. I don't like, I don't want people to think of me in a negative way. Like I, I remember, you know, there's been times in my life where I've heard negative things about me, and you immediately wanna confront it. And it's not fun, it doesn't feel good. But if you know your own self-worth, you can kinda say, you know what? It is what it is, man. Not everybody's gonna like me anyways. And I'm not here to please everybody either. I, I have one duty, a couple duties, but it goes family, right? My religion, my work, and then everything else, friendship, jujitsu, all that stuff is down the line.

Vance Crowe [01:18:31] The, your temperament, your

Morgan Freed [01:18:34] Demeanor

Vance Crowe [01:18:35] Is completely opposite of the way you look. Right? Like, I mean, like you have a bullock and you're, you know, you're, you're as imposing as a,

Morgan Freed [01:18:45] I'm a classically trained piano player who can play violin and saxophone. Right? My first dates with my wife, I took her to, I was playing piano at a YMC for little kids doing a dance. And then the second date I took her to a funeral. So you get what you get. But yeah, you

Vance Crowe [01:18:58] Really are classically, yeah, I

Morgan Freed [01:18:59] Can rock out, man. If you had a piano here, I could play for you.

Vance Crowe [01:19:02] No

Morgan Freed [01:19:02] Kidding. Yeah. It's funny

Vance Crowe [01:19:04] Dude. What it is. I think you're just like a big soft nerd wrapped in like a killer's body. I, I like, I okay with that. I don't if this is like hopeful for everyone else or if it's like Morgan is the craziest riddle I've ever met. You

Morgan Freed [01:19:17] Know, it's, I'm, it's a good, it's,

Vance Crowe [01:19:20] It's

Morgan Freed [01:19:21] Really

Vance Crowe [01:19:22] Like you're

Morgan Freed [01:19:22] Vulnerable, right?

Vance Crowe [01:19:23] And you, you are reading books about love languages. Oh yeah. You work with kids, you wear a fanny pack, but you could get to somebody we'll totally. Somebody's

Morgan Freed [01:19:31] Totally we'll totally punch you and choke you to death. Like I'm also okay with

Vance Crowe [01:19:34] That, right? Just the dirty trick in jujitsu. Like, I'll hug you

Morgan Freed [01:19:37] Or I could probably kill you.

Vance Crowe [01:19:39] And is this it is what? It's, is this who you've always been? You have flames on your arm, so you wanted people to have some

Morgan Freed [01:19:48] Yeah, I, like I said, the brick is where everything changed for me. So I didn't even get, I got this after, after the brick. I've got one on my leg and a big giant one on my back. It's a hard question to answer because I don't know who I've always been. I can't remember the old v ah, I can't remember the, the two, 2002 before me. Like, I can't even, like if you, if you remember your childhood, I can't remember like what mine was like much, I mean, I remember things, but I don't remember who that person was. Like, was, was Morgan silly or was Morgan this, I can see me doing things like having activities, but I don't remember my, what, what was he, I don't remember. Was he friendly dude? Was he a not a friendly dude? All I know is the 2002 me, which is, is like a, so it's could be, I could be honestly two different people. But the 2002 is version 2.0 I guess in a sense.

Vance Crowe [01:20:47] I mean that one.

Morgan Freed [01:20:48] So, I mean,

Vance Crowe [01:20:49] He was baptized by a rock, right? Yeah. And then, and then everything in your life, everything

Morgan Freed [01:20:53] Changed. Yep. Everything changed. Everything changed. Yeah. And it wasn't even until I met my wife and moved in with her that I was willing to even do any of that. So I had buried it all when I met my wife. She's, I remember she said, you know, you fight in your sleep, you have all this stuff going on. Is there anything that happened in your life? I'm like, well, yeah, I got hit in the head with a brick once. And she's like, that's a big deal. I'm like,

Vance Crowe [01:21:15] Oh, she didn't know that. Yeah,

Morgan Freed [01:21:16] I didn't, I I never talked about it. That

Vance Crowe [01:21:17] Wasn't like a chapter that was like, oh, this is an important one. Only

Morgan Freed [01:21:21] Recently in the last

Vance Crowe [01:21:22] Did she feel pretty pissed off that you had She was

Morgan Freed [01:21:24] Actually upset.

Vance Crowe [01:21:24] Yeah, I bet. She said, I got married and

Morgan Freed [01:21:26] You didn't tell me that. I'm like, I didn't think it was a big deal.

Vance Crowe [01:21:28] Oh man.

Morgan Freed [01:21:29] So I probably had a

Vance Crowe [01:21:30] But you literally, you're like Don Draper. Yeah. I mean like, in a way did you ever watch madness?

Morgan Freed [01:21:35] Yeah. Yeah. I

Vance Crowe [01:21:35] Mean that's what he did. He had one identity. Put it to sleep. Yeah. Has a new one. Yeah.

Morgan Freed [01:21:40] And

Vance Crowe [01:21:41] She married John. She married that

Morgan Freed [01:21:42] One. Yeah. So I think, you know, it's, it's, she had brought that up and I, one I never noticed. 'cause you get so used to it. So I get lost. I have to have a GPS in my car, A GPS in my phone. I have to ride out directions. I'll get lost all the time. I could never, like right now, I have no idea where we're at. If you took my phone, I could not find my way home. I don't, I east, west nor south zero idea right now. It just will not work in my brain.

Vance Crowe [01:22:09] Oh wow.

Morgan Freed [01:22:11] So

Vance Crowe [01:22:12] Man, to be unmoored from a compass or from the ability to have direction would be really disoriented.

Morgan Freed [01:22:19] Yeah. I get lost all the time. I've lost my car before in Walmart. Like I'm assuming everybody does in Walmart parking lots. But I've literally not been able to find it. Like I've had to have people drive me around. That happens frequently. So there's stuff like that. Headaches. I have really bad headaches a lot. There are other stuff. But yeah, when I met my wife, I was, I kind of buried it all or just dealt with it. So you, they call it coping mechanism. So coping a mechanism is phone. GPS two, GPS, things in my car, a baton, a knife, flare gun, regular gun. All these coping mechanisms.

Vance Crowe [01:22:57] Dude, I'm glad you you're talking to people.

Morgan Freed [01:22:59] Deal.

Vance Crowe [01:22:59] Holy

Morgan Freed [01:23:00] Geez.

Vance Crowe [01:23:00] With

Morgan Freed [01:23:01] What could go wrong. Okay, I can't get lost. Got my gun, got this, I've got that, I've got flares. I could, you know, this could happen in the w I'm ready coping. What do they do? They let me drive a little safer and feel a little better. Cool. We're going to juujitsu another coping, coping mechanism. You can't hurt me anymore because I know how to hurt you first.

Vance Crowe [01:23:20] Do you mechanism, do you I like, I don't, I don't know. I'm not making light of it. I just, I've never, you seem like the person that if you're triggered the wrong way, you're the road rage guy that if, if you're oriented the wrong way. Right? I don't mean trigger it. I mean like, if you're oriented towards rage and anger and you know a guy like you, well prepared,

Morgan Freed [01:23:41] Right?

Vance Crowe [01:23:42] Is is it is.

Morgan Freed [01:23:44] I would say we're probably, people like me are probably in that statistic for sure. So how do we deal with it? Therapy Juujitsu, having a family support network, the VA has been wonderful for me. Picking your partner in life smartly. So for me, waiting 35 years to get married, to find the woman I knew was my, honestly my soulmate.

Vance Crowe [01:24:08] I, I got married

Morgan Freed [01:24:09] Late. All those things.

Vance Crowe [01:24:10] Yeah.

Morgan Freed [01:24:12] Combined into this. So I, I'd like to think, you know, it's very prudent planning and God keeping, you know, keeping his eye on me. I was raised Jewish. I tell people I was a, were chosen for a reason.

Vance Crowe [01:24:26] Oh, you weren't? I'm Jewish. You were Jewish over there too. Yep. Jewish over in east. My

Morgan Freed [01:24:30] Father, my father's Jewish, I'm Jewish. Never believed in anything till, you know, I met my wife. I remember I had, I was searching for something, I happened to have the Bible on CD in my car. There was lots of weird connections. She had made a list. She was looking for a man too. Like she wanted a life to share and she made a list. Her friend called her and said, why don't you write down and tell God or whoever they wanna call it, write down what you're looking for. And she writes this list and literally it's a hundred percent me plays music, wants a family, da da da da da. It's, it's actually really, there's a lot of weird connections we have with that. We met, I imagine I'm in a timeline before she even met me where I was working at the wine, she's, it's like, she's like, there's this dude walking around spraying air spray in the air while she was pregnant. Like, so there's all these weird coincidences that really are not coincidences. It's fate, dude. That's, I believe in that fate, destiny path, you know, walking it, seeing it.

Vance Crowe [01:25:30] So how do you, if you think that everything is predestined Yeah, if there's fate, then the what is the suffering fit in, right? Because it's like you, you're, you

Morgan Freed [01:25:40] Know it's

Vance Crowe [01:25:41] Gonna happen. It's inevitable.

Morgan Freed [01:25:42] You, it's, it's people. There's a lot of different answers you can give. My wife would say, we're not meant to suffer. And that's the devil. And he does it. And that's, that's, you can dly believe that. I think, you know, why is there suffering? Well, if you look at it like this, like one, if we're gonna talk religionist and I'm no expert, like I'm brand new. I'm maybe on four years on my path. I think things, it's just, things just happen. And you know, God wants what's best for us, but he also gave us free will. And we're gonna make decisions and some people are gonna do bad things. And it is, you know, that's why you gotta, you gotta train and be prepared 'cause it's gonna happen.

Vance Crowe [01:26:19] And I think that that part of suffering that you're talking about in, in training is suffering in order to get somewhere else else. So some else. So suffering can't all be bad. Right. If you can find a way to make it meaningful. Yeah. Well Morgan, I had no idea what we were gonna talk about, but coach was right. You were an excellent choice. Well, thank you.

Morgan Freed [01:26:36] Thank you. I'd like

Vance Crowe [01:26:37] To think I'm interesting. At least it's at least fad. This was a blast and I look forward to rolling with you. Cool. Thank you so much. You're probably on Saturday if you can be around.

Morgan Freed [01:26:43] We're headed to New York. So my wife's parents live in New York. We go twice a year. We go to Buffalo. I go train up there, there's a gym up there I train with. And they're good.

Vance Crowe [01:26:53] Say I don't ever stop

Morgan Freed [01:26:54] Training. So we go there for 10 days in the winter and then we go there for about a month in the summer.

Vance Crowe [01:26:59] Well, let's find a time in the beginning of the year. So

Morgan Freed [01:27:02] I'm down man. Thank you for having me. Appreciate it. Thank you so much for coming it. Cool. Woo.